


yes i listen to drake

by funkwavremix



Category: League of Legends RPF
Genre: Angst, Break Up, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-04
Updated: 2018-04-04
Packaged: 2019-04-18 11:23:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14212071
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/funkwavremix/pseuds/funkwavremix
Summary: This is how Seungbin and Hyukkyu never get back together.





	yes i listen to drake

**Author's Note:**

> i will never get over ssw/ssb, maybe it's time i accept that. this is just a lot of self-projecting and venting about my own personal r/s though. there is a slight mention of past dandy/mata so. yeah.

It was bound to happen at some point and Hyukkyu should at least be grateful that Seungbin was the one who was bold enough to pull the trigger and kind enough to be just the right amount of asshole about it. Seungbin keeps it concise and clean, stating all the reasons why that Hyukkyu has kept in his back pocket all this time, just in case.

When it started, Hyukkyu knew it would end with someone getting wasted and drunk texting the other, just never imagined that it wouldn't be Seungbin.

“Three messages over Kakao Talk?” Kyungho pours Hyukkyu another one. “That's cold. Are you always into guys like that?”

Hyukkyu instinctively thinks _no_ . He’s into _one_ guy like that, or he supposedly _was_ , anyway.

“No,” Hyukkyu says. “Not really.”

Kyungho gives Hyukkyu a knowing look and says nothing as he downs his own shot. Hyukkyu is bent over the fold out table they’re drinking at, his head in his hands. His red ears peek out from the cover of his arms. Kyungho gives Hyukkyu what he thinks is a comforting shoulder rub.

“Cheer up,” he offers weakly.

Hyukkyu nods, but has a hard time believing it when Kyungho doesn't seem too sure about his own words either.

“Thanks,” Hyukkyu says. “That's helpful.”

“There are plenty of fish in the sea.”

“Mmhm.”

“It's not you, it's him.”

“Sure.”

“Good things end to make room for great things.”

“Uh huh.”

“I'm kind of out of sayings already, so I'm going to need you to cheer up soon,” Kyungho says. “It gets better.”

Something about Kyungho’s voice sounds oddly wistful. It travels far before echoing back at them. The reverb makes Hyukkyu painfully aware of how alone they are together.

#

When he wakes up with a hangover the following morning and walks out to the kitchen, he receives a snide remark and a snigger from Sehyeong, halfway through his mid-morning snack. Hyukkyu accepts them, because he should’ve known better than to expect more from Sehyeong anyway.

“There’s food in the fridge for you,” Sehyeong finally says after he’s had his fun poking at Hyukkyu’s bloated face and bad breath and worsened eye bags.

“Thanks,” Hyukkyu mutters, shuffling towards the fridge. “Where’s Kyungho?”

“He’s fine, already practicing,” Sehyeong replies. “Doesn’t look any worse than you. You look like rubbish, by the way.”

Hyukkyu rubs his eyes and picks out the easiest thing to microwave from the fridge and half-crawls over to the microwave. Sehyeong gives him a pitying look and tosses a half-used sheet of painkillers at him.

“Had to dig this out from the meds cabinet,” Sehyeong says. “Most of us don’t get shitfaced in the postseason.”

Hyukkyu should be worried about what the coaches are going to say once they find out what he’s been up to last night, but he’s more concerned about the pain throbbing in his head. He gratefully pockets the tablets Sehyeong has bestowed on him. The microwave’s bell goes off after what seems like an eternity.

Sehyeong raises a brow at him when Hyukkyu slides into a seat at the table with his food.

“So,” he starts, like Hyukkyu expects him to. “You got wasted last night.”

Hyukkyu eats in silence and waits for Sehyeong to continue in what is sure to be one of his rants and lectures of their old Samsung days.

“What were you _thinking_ ?” Sehyeong’s voice is hushed, but it doesn’t hide his fury at all. That’s the thing, Hyukkyu _wasn’t_ thinking, even if he feels like all he’s been doing lately is exactly that.

“Sorry,” Hyukkyu says in between spoonfuls of bland white rice. “Sorry.”

“Why were you drinking anyway?” Sehyeong asks. “It’s kind of pathetic, the both of you.”

Hyukkyu gulps down some water. His throat is still dry.

“We broke up,” Hyukkyu says. It comes out better than when he told Kyungho, so he should be glad about the progress. “Yesterday afternoon.”

Hyukkyu wishes Sehyeong could continue being pissed at him after that. Instead, he just pities Hyukkyu. It’s the best Hyukkyu could expect from him anyway, Sehyeong has never been known for his comforting nature. Murderous looks, yes, kind heart, no.

“It happens,” he says. It sounds better than Hyukkyu imagined it to be. The attempt at comfort doesn’t last long. “You should have known.”

Of course Hyukkyu knew.

“Did _you_ know?” Hyukkyu retorts. “Did you tell _Inkyu_ you knew?”

It’s low and it’s rude, and normally Hyukkyu would never bring it up because it’s a nasty, ugly bruise that’s still healing, that thing Inkyu and Sehyeong left on each other, whatever it was. Sehyeong purses his lips into an even thinner line and his face stiffens.

“That’s different,” Sehyeong says, like he had a chance of convincing Hyukkyu. “We’re in a different place now. We chose to come here, play here. You have to _stay_ here.”

In reality, it’s not all that different.

Sehyeong runs across land then across water and doesn’t look back, as though he doesn’t want Inkyu to chase after him. Hyukkyu wants to slow down, to let Seungbin come for him, but Seungbin’s out of breath and all the water does is lift Hyukkyu to the surface, where the sun shines too brightly and burns too hotly. His limbs ache for the tides to wash him away already, but all he can do is keep swimming in the meantime.

#

_“Hyukkyu,” Seungbin sings as he thunders into the room and throws himself at Hyukkyu with the grace of a stumbling infant. He smells like alcohol and already sounds like an upcoming headache for Hyukkyu to deal with. “Hyung missed you.”_

_“It's been a few hours,” Hyukkyu states the obvious as he tries to push Seungbin off him. The older boy seems more insistent today and so that requires more effort than usual. “You smell terrible.”_

_“Mhm,” Seungbin giggles. It's one of the most terrifying noises Hyukkyu has ever heard and instantly triggers his fight or flight response. “Your shirt is so soft.”_

_Seungbin snuggles even closer to Hyukkyu, his head buried in the crook of Hyukkyu’s neck, his hot breath tickling Hyukkyu’s skin. Seungbin’s arms wrap around Hyukkyu’s waist and holds him in place. The weight on Hyukkyu’s heart feels similar to the one Seungbin’s body presses on to his own._

_“Don't be difficult hyung,” Hyukkyu says, even though he's given up on struggling._

_“Don't be mean,” Seungbin whines like the big baby Hyukkyu knows him to be. “I love you.”_

_“That's gross,” Hyukkyu wrinkles his nose. Drunk Seungbin is only marginally worse than sober Seungbin and Hyukkyu doesn't know if he should be grateful for that or not._

_“I do,” Seungbin reaffirms, despite Hyukkyu never asking him to. “Come on, say it back.”_

_“No.”_

_“It's easy,” Seungbin says, reaching up to Hyukkyu’s face and pulling at his cheeks. Seungbin is giddy when he imitates Hyukkyu._

_“I.”_

_Yank._

_“Love.”_

_Yank._

_“You.”_

_Yank._

_“Seungbin-hyung.”_

_Yank._

_“Always. Forever. So much.”_

_Yank._

_“Are you done?” Hyukkyu asks, but he can't be bothered to feel annoyed._

_“Not until you say it,” Seungbin says, not removing his hands from Hyukkyu’s sore face. “I--”_

_“Love you.”_

_When Hyukkyu says it, Seungbin’s eyes widen behind his glasses, just for a split second before they return to their normal unreadable mischief._

_“Say that again.”_

_“Love you,” Hyukkyu feels feverish from his words alone and he can't imagine how red his face must be getting. “I love you. Happy?”_

_Seungbin plants a sloppy wet kiss on Hyukkyu’s cheek that makes him shudder._

_“Oh Hyukkyu,” Seungbin fakes a dreamy sigh. “You wouldn't know. Make an honest man out of me Kim Hyukkyu.”_

#

His phone feels heavy in his chapped hands as he scrolls through their Kakao Talk logs. The last message was from a couple of months ago, when they broke up. It feels like regression when he refers to himself and Seungbin as _they_ , but it's strange when he doesn’t.

The messages are brief. They don't have the time to keep it going. It's too difficult and Seungbin is lazy. Work gets in the way too much. It was fun while it lasted and it lasted far longer than it should have.

To be honest, it's much better than what Hyukkyu expected from Seungbin, it's a lot kinder than what Seungbin is capable of, what Seungbin is entitled to be, at least. Hyukkyu wonders how much truth Seungbin had in him when he said Hyukkyu was like a child.

It's just a coincidence that he thought of Seungbin again after all those months, now if he could only stop being such a _baby_ about it and find out if it's also just a coincidence that his eyes are watering up like he had wanted them to back then. He feels his throat close up and his cheeks sting like when he's with Seungbin, only now it hurts more than it excites him.

_Time heals everything._

Hyukkyu thinks it's unfair that time would betray him like this.

#

Hyukkyu hears from a friend of a friend of a friend that Seungbin is back in town. Sehyeong gives him an irritating look when Hyukkyu suddenly takes out his best casual outfit and rolls away the lint on his non-uniform coat.

“What are you doing?” Sehyeong asks him as Hyukkyu tries to do a decent job of ironing his skinny jeans.

“I'm going to see someone,” Hyukkyu states flatly. “Be careful of the iron.”

“Who?”

“That's not important,” Hyukkyu answers. “You're going to get burnt if you keep peering over the iron like that, hyung.”

#

Dinner goes well and Hyukkyu manages to keep Seungbin interested enough to remain sober and coherent through the majority of it. The warmth from the barbecue grill makes his face flush a bit, but it's nothing noticeable compared the alcohol-induced red stains on Seungbin’s cheeks. Hyukkyu helps Seungbin pour another shot into his own glass as motor skills are quickly evading him.

“You know,” Seungbin says abruptly. “I liked you.”

Hyukkyu freezes, barely noticing the alcohol overflowing Seungbin’s glass.

“Hyung--”

“A lot. I liked you,” Seungbin continues. “So much. But why don't you like me? Why didn't you like me back?”

Hyukkyu opens his mouth to protest. He did. Hyukkyu did like Seungbin back, it felt brief back then but it feels like an eternity now, that period in their short lives when Hyukkyu liked Seungbin just as much as Seungbin liked Hyukkyu and they were content pretending like their relationship had any substance in it suitable for the future.

“I'm sorry,” Hyukkyu says.

He did, he did like Seungbin back, it's what he wants to say, so badly. But he doesn't say that, because it's not right.

In the game, he learns that timing is everything. The objectives spawn at the right time and he has to be at the right place, with the right people, with the right abilities lined up and timed to perfection.

They are neither the right people nor are they at the right place or the right time.

“But you know, I get you,” Seungbin says. “I don't get why you don't just wanna stay for the money and stuff and I don’t get why you gotta go with that asshole.”

“Sehyeong hyung is alright.”

“Maybe it's mercy,” Seungbin half mumbles. “You'll probably kick my ass now anyway.”

“1v1s aren't everything.”

Seungbin grins. His lips are pulled upwards in a sloppy smile. He pats Hyukkyu’s cheek and his dry hand feels cold when it comes in contact with Hyukkyu’s skin.

“You can come back.”

“That's nice.”

“You just need to practice harder.”

“Mhm.”

“Hyung.”

“You're cute Hyukkyu.”

Seungbin mumbles somethings else unintelligible and then slowly slumps down over the table. Hyukkyu watches and moves the glassware away from him, careful not to disturb Seungbin’s unconscious figure. He turns off the grill and wait for the embers to wither before flagging down a waiter for the bill.

**Author's Note:**

> i wish i was able to write coherent stories with clear beginnings and end. but such is life. kt please go to busan for lck finals you make great dandy bait and i miss him dearly.


End file.
